20 Things that are only cute when you are a kid but can get you in trouble or arrested as a grown up

20

February 6, 2013 by Katia

3 Year Old’s behaviours are classic 3 year old. Remember when you were 3? When you had a cry you really milked that cry. Your eyebrows, cheeks and nose all turned tomato red, perhaps you threw in some fists and a floor sprawl as well? 3 Year Old’s daily Academy Award winning meltdowns are caused by the most unexpected reasons: the color of the balloon stick doesn’t match the color of the balloon, mommy needs to dilute the hot water in the tub with some cold water, mommy showed up in daycare to pick him up. To cope I distance myself from the situation and similar to “imagine them all naked” I tell myself “imagine yourself in his shoes”. Much like “imagine them all naked” that doesn’t work either. I am still left feeling like cold water’s the way to go. That got me thinking, some behaviours that are considered acceptable and even cute when performed by children could get you in trouble as a grown up. Here is a list of things you shouldn’t do unless you’re 3. Or 4. I look forward to your additions:

Not cool if you’re a grown up.

1. Take off your underwear on your way to the washroom
2. Make a public announcement at a party that you just peed and pooped
3. Try to blow out someone else’s birthday cake candles
4. Cry when you are dropped off somewhere where you are going to spend the rest of the day and maybe initially didn’t want to go, like work
5. Spit out food that you don’t like on the table but only once you’ve given it a good chew
6. Sing the ABC song
7. Talk about Monsters like they exist
8. Watch tv from 2 inches away from the screen
9. Treat furniture like it’s optional and multi functional
10. Participate in something called pajama day
11. Scream, take off your shirt and throw it on the floor if you think that it might be wet
12. Demand a new balloon NOW
13. Use “because I wanna!!!!” as a valid explanation for your sour disposition
14. Explain to an authoritative figure that an ice cream will make it all better
15. Refuse to dry yourself up after a bath
16. Run naked from the bathroom, slip and fall in an attempt to drink your glass of milk before someone else gets hold of it
17. Ask someone to kiss your ouchy
18. Wrestle in bed with your parents and fart
19. Say “well, I guess I should go and stay in somebody else’s home” when an authoritative figure is not too happy with you performance
20. Wear plush slippers
21. Your suggestions please.

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