April 22, 2013 by Katia
Last week 8 Month Old decided it was time to take us to the ER. After a four hour wait he was diagnosed with a temper. D-effing-uh.
6 hours earlier – 7 p.m.
3 Year Old’s Bedroom
Original Life Expectancy Me: common, we have to finish brushing out teeth, rinse, rinse, rinse and spit. Rinse, rinse, rinse and spit (blue birds are circling the air holding 3 Year Old’s cup, fluttering about, as a chipmunk hands him his tooth brush).
Resigned 3 Year Old: mmmmmmmmmmm.
In the meantime downstairs darkness is brewing. 8 Month Old’s gotten hold of a flute and he is chewing on it. The Baby Sitter pulls it right out of his mouth. A short but passionate battle ensues and then…
Calm Experienced Mature Babysitter: KATIA, KATIA, CALL 911! KATIA, CALL 911! DANIEL! DANIEL!!!!
New Life Expectancy Me: I’M COMING!!!!!!!!! (pushing 3 Year Old off my lap, water spills out of his mouth, birds escape, chipmunk drinks from the little puddle on the floor, then shamed by bird’s gaze, runs off.)
I gallop down the stairs hearing 8 Month Old’s name called out repeatedly and no sound from my baby, carrying rejuvenated 3 Year Old who after the initial scare (3 seconds ago) is now totally psyched to find out what sort of an adventure is unfolding in our living room.
Although still non responsive but definitely awake, 8 Month Old, looking pale and a little blue is sitting in baby sitter’s lap, blankly staring. I call 911 and in response to the customer servicey “what is your emergency today” I bleat “my behehehehehe-beeeeeeeeeeeeeeee” and then have a three way conversation with the Baby Sitter who’s describing how 8 Month Old got very upset, stiffened up and stopped breathing, the person on the phone who says words like seizure and medically curious 3 Year Old who excitedly interrupts me with the polite but insistent “excuse me!” demanding to find out what the Doctor is telling me.
8 Month Old is snapping out of it very quickly. Paramedics show up, 3 Year Old asks why their latexed hands are blue, discusses youghurt and gets a tour of the ambulance. I depart with slightly confused but visibly cheerful and energetic 8 Month Old.
Thursday, just before 1 a.m.
ER Doctor at the Hospital for Sick Children: Some babies just do this, daddy. They get so angry and don’t know how to express it, so they hold their breath until they turn blue. Don’t worry, Daddy, Baby always knows when to stop. It’s not dangerous.
Well, colour me not blue and call me not worried.
When I call 36 Year Old for the 50th time since he replaced me at the hospital he tells me this. So basically it was a decision on his part? I ask for a clarification and get a positive response.
Uhuh, that sounds about right.
Did you ever have to call 911 for your kids?