May 2, 2013 by Katia
Somewhere to plug my TV in, please, because:
Dear Reputable Gossip and Popular Culture Website,
What happens if one day The Walking Dead’s Jon Bernthal arrives in Toronto to promote his newish movie, Snitch, and you need a mommy blogger to interview him but Ali Martell is taking her kids to Karate and Jeni Marinucci is stuck on the train from Milton? Have you given any thought to this and do you have a Plan B?? Because I have and I do (I do, Shane, I do!). It just so happens that I’m right here in Toronto and it’s very possible that I’m preemptively sucking my stomach in and wearing some brand new Spanx, ready to hop on the next train downtown. I’ve been waiting for this moment
since I’ve started watching the show a month ago for a very long time and I’m ready to show up at the Four Seasons and be all like “baby, talk Zombie to me” and he’ll be all like “but I’m here to talk about Snitch” and I’m all like “you may kiss the bride, Shane”.
Remember that guy who interviewed Mila Kunis and went viral? I can do so much worse!
First I’ll be all giggly and then I’ll faint, what with the new Spanx and the excitement and all. Did I mention I have a crush on Shane? Don’t worry I’ll make sure not to call him that during the interview, I know how to be professional.
Once I’ve come around I’ll want to talk a little bit about his two boys, but mainly about mine, and tell him about the hilarious Zombie impression I do for my 3-year-old and how my mom admires it over the phone from Israel based strictly on my verbal description. Israel is going to be my segue into Judaism. Told you I was a professional. This is where I get all philosophical about being Jewish and I might ask some deep questions like: Is it cool to be Jewish in Hollywood these days? Like does that make you cooler? Do you know Ashton Kutcher? Is he Jewish? Do you know Madonna? I’m pretty sure Shane is Jewish, that’s why I’m asking him all that stuff.
While he’s answering my questions, I’ll make sure to interrupt him whenever I feel like there’s a spoiler coming up, because I’m on season 2 on Netflix and I don’t know yet that Shane is dead. (He’s dead, right? NO, DON’T tell me!!!)
SOME other things I intend to do with him are to put him on the phone with my 3-year-old to explain to him that zombies don’t really exist, show him my zombie impression and ask him to follow me on Twitter.
We can do some great things together, you, me and Jon Bernthal. Until then I’ll be waiting, in my Spanx, holding my breath.
* My husband, 36 Year Old, is amazing. And very good looking too. He loves reading my blog.
** No spoilers in comments please. I really DON’T know that Shane is dead. Or how it happened.
*** Who is your favourite TV character?
This post is part of Finish the Sentence Friday. Our lovely hosts are:
Janine at Janine’s Confessions of a Mommyaholic
Stephanie at Mommy, for Real
Dawn at Dawn’s Disaster