101 Ways (OK, Make it 6) To Incorporate the Word Poop Into a Conversation

7

August 14, 2013 by Katia

This piece was written back in February. Not much has changed since, except the boys’ ages. Right now we are pooping in Israel. Catch us when 4 Year Old and I come back on the 20th.

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Future parents, I’m sorry, but you knew this was coming, right? The inevitable poop post. At least it’s short. ish.

The dawn of the age of potty talk is upon us (are you humming Aquarius too, or are you young?) On the cusp of his fourth birthday, 3 Year Old finally realized that poop is funnier than anything else so now EVERYTHING is poop. I stand corrected – some things are actually poopy. And whatever’s not poop or poopy is poopy-head. This happened on Sunday:

3 year old: what you’re saying is rude. All right, poop head?

— Katia DBE (@KatiaDBE) February 24, 2013

Hi nice to meet you, I am The Milk, a.k.a. poop head.

On Monday 36 Year Old went back to work and then there were three, myself and 6 Month Old – awake since 4am and on the opposite end of the energy level spectrum – 3 Year Old putting his best foot forward in a battle against nursery school attendance. And then there was a fourth, silent partner, with us – my back ache. I decided to appeal to 3 Year Old’s better nature and knowledge of Treehouse TV “what’s gonna work?” I last-end-resorted expecting him to sing back “teaaaam work!”as usual. Instead he fired “poop work!” at me, squeezed out a fake cheeky laugh and ran. Welcome to my new life.

Here are some more poop references all made in the last 48 hours.

Monday Afternoon

I poop on your conbersation. (sic)
I poop on your conbersation (sic)

I poop on your conbersation – in response to “how was nursery school?”

Monday Afternoon

Sometimes I ponder God. And poop.
Sometimes I ponder God. And poop.

3 Year Old: Mommy? What if we wanted to make a smaller earth? Would there still be, ummmm, earth?

Me (not quite getting it, but understanding that he is trying to express something profound, but can’t find the exact words, I finally decide on: ) It’s one of the greatest mysteries in life. We’re not exactly sure who created earth.

3 Year Old: Maybe God.

Me (this could be a key moment in his life, in a soft spiritual tone): Maybe.

3 Year Old: Maybe Poop God. (cheeky teeth exposing fake laugh). – in the car.

Tuesday Morning

You're eating poop meal!
You’re eating poop meal!

You’re eating poopmeal! – In response to “mommy, what are you eating?” “Oatmeal”.

I'm more of a 'if you wanna poop, poop don't talk' kind of guy.
I’m more of a ‘if you wanna poop, poop don’t talk’ kind of guy.

Does this sound like your life, poopy heads?

7 thoughts on “101 Ways (OK, Make it 6) To Incorporate the Word Poop Into a Conversation

  1. Aditi says:

    Hahaha hilarious post this one!! Adorable pics🙂 n all the poppy talk is so cute🙂 best one was ‘poop God’ OMG!

  2. The Waiting says:

    My daughter is just now learning to say “poo-poo” so that she can identify when she’s gone, so of course all the p-words she knows also come out as “pooooooo.”

    • Katia says:

      😀 HAHA! I remember when Ben (4) was just learning how to talk and for a while he called trucks, f*cks. And a dump truck was a dumb f*ck.

  3. […] This piece was written back in February. Not much has changed since, except the boys’ ages. Right now we are pooping in Israel. Catch us when 4 Year Old and I come back on the 20th.  […]

  4. Hi poop head! Ok you’re totally NOT a poop head and I hope you’re having a wonderful time in Israel. I can’t wait to see photos when you return (and I miss you).
    My son just now got that poop is stinky. So now he’ll run around saying “ew nasty poop! stinky!” Yay boys😉

    • Katia says:

      Yay for Tucker entering the poop stage!!!

      I miss you too, my friend. It’s going well, it’ll take me a while to process all of this and then I’ll write about it, once I did.

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Tired. Going from 10 months of staying at home with the kids to full time work is disorienting.  I have to redefine what my involvement in their lives looks like. I have to go dig for my creativity, it's not readily available. I have to make room for friendships that were already pushed to the outskirts of my mommy life. What was previously inaccessible, existing in the "so near yet so far" category - books, blazers and heels - became a staple in this old new reality in a matter of days. Tired and disoriented but also content, supported and appreciative. #momsofinstagram #random #randomthoughts #changes #workingmom #tired #tgif
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