“Who Are You Wearing” Means Many Different Things In Mommyverse. None Of Them Red-Carpet-Related.
59January 28, 2014 by Katia
Imagine an army of moms in yoga pants, sweats and buns invading the red carpet and responding to a slightly confused “Who are you wearing?” Wanna be that mom? We bring you a different kind of red carpet vision. A #365 Feminist Selfie red carpet. Stay, admire the parade of outfits you’re about to see and share your own through our linkup. The linkup is live until Sunday evening. You can also tweet about us with the hashtag #WhoAreYouWearingMom and invite your friends to join.
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A couple of weeks ago I dedicated an entire post to why I’m not friends with Award Season anymore. Ish. Bottom line being: it’s bad for me. Ish. I don’t take my sleep deprivation with a side of why-don’t-we-also-force-you-to-look-at-this-parade-of-clean-people-who-had-time-to-shower-while-we-keep-you-up-until-midnight? No thanks. I’ll just watch for five more minutes and then I’m done. Ish.
Well, that was Golden Globes ago. Post-Grammy me is chill and has a totally different outlook on life, stuff, Robin Thicke and everything red carpet. I have no idea what I was so worked up about. It’s not like there’s no room for bling in my life.
Evidence
Come, join me on my ketchup-stained red carpet and let’s talk “who are you wearing”.
BOOM!
And a bonus. Accessory: cold. As in swollen red nose.
Sure, if you were to ask me one year ago, the answer would have totally been “Daniel, DUH!” but now I get the relevancy of the question.
Have you ever heard of vision boards? A mom’s outfit is a different kind of a vision board. One that tells a story of what her kids were fed, how they were entertained, whether they managed to avoid milk spillage incidents or not and whether they tried to drown each other during bath time. It’s reasonable to assume that at any given point I’m a visual representation of my kids’ day and as such I’m wearing both Ben AND Daniel.
Now let’s stop beating around the bush and talk hair. I know you were expecting a bun and then Boom! This! Moms have an unwritten code whereby hair is a private part. Don’t show me yours and I won’t show you mine, but since we are red-carpeting here today I’ll treat you to my combover look. It’s really easy moms, don’t wash your hair for two weeks and then comb it over to the side.
Makeup: REALLY?
Accessories: fridge and grocery store bag with used diaper. You asked.
Et voila! All of this for less than $25. Sleep deprivation included.
Now show me yours!
Please visit our other fabulous hosts:
Jen at My Skewed View
Jean at Mama Schmama
Sarah at Left Brain Buddha
Stephanie at Mommy, For Real
Deb at Urban Moo Cow
Sarah at The Sadder but Wiser Girl
Kristi at Finding Ninee
Rachel at Tao of Poop
Jane at Nothing by the Book
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iamthemilk 
Oh my! Um, you wear your mom wear well, Katia!
Yes, the kitchen light apparently is flattering. From now on it’s traveling with me.
Love the bling. I’m jealous. I have none! Or does a stray googly eye stuck to my sock count?
You could get crafty and bedazzle your socks!
Yes, I snorted at the “bling”. And I just love the idea of being a story of our kids. It’s a very creative image, Katia and, for some reason, makes me feel really emotional. I think it’s because it really does speak to our dedication to our kids and to being moms. Thank you for coming up with this idea. I’ve written like four times now that I am feeling really jazzed reading everyone’s posts. Seeing this great idea go live is very, very cool.
Love! I’m off to read everyone else’s. Thank you for getting emotional over this, my friend, I honestly didn’t expect that anyone will, but love you for it.
Pretty much the same. Plus, rarely a bra.
RESPECT.
Also, share a pic! We’re live till Sunday. (I don’t insist on you not wearing a bra).
LOL people think I’m kidding when I say I can’t remember the last day I showered. Often it’s day 6 when I realize I’m having deja vu, hmmm. I usually shower Fridays. don’t I? Typing with a n 8yo in my lap is a chore. sorry. That’s what I’m wearing. 8 year old head.
Love. You are looking sassy in that kitchen chicka!
😀 I am laughing out loud reading this comment. LOVE it. I have to say I did not expect to turn out well, I think that light is very flattering and from now on allof my photos are going to be in the kitchen. With a bag of poop.
“Ketchup stained red carpet” had me laughing so hard my husband made me read the post aloud. SO perfect and with any luck I’ll get a chance to linkup this weekend!
Please do!!! And thank you for laughing out loud, that’s so awesome to know that I did this! 😀
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This is such a great look on you, very insouciant-chic.
BTW, that post was very popular – it had great views. 🙂
Awesome! I love that it got good views!
Hoping you’d consider joining us, Natalie! 🙂
I genuinely love this idea and your post! I just linked up…hopefully I did it right. I really had fun doing this and can’t wait for Kelly and Michael to call for my interview. I KNOW Kelly is dying to get into my fluffy brown slippers and purple and blue head band.
Hey I don’t have any bling! No fair! I so want some of those comfy slippers! This was too fun-seeing all of you beautiful moms and your comfyness! Did I just make up a word????
This is where you Martha Stewrdness comes in handy. I’m sure you’ve got some tricks for bedazzling ones slippers.
I love the look! And those bling boots are awesome! 🙂
I know, would you believe my husband chose them for me??
Love it! I actually have a vision board…. never thought of my clothes as one, too! And I love the blingy slippers. seriously.
Yay, a fellow blingy. I knew it!
This is my favourite part: “A mom’s outfit is a different kind of a vision board. One that tells a story of what her kids were fed, how they were entertained, whether they managed to avoid milk spillage incidents or not and whether they tried to drown each other during bath time.” xoxo
But that’s what we truly are are, right? Vision boards.
Love that I’m not alone in not showering often! And you look beautiful with the comb-over in the kitchen. I’m going to try that as I usually revert to a pony tail. I appreciate the tip and will let you know how it goes. Most excellent way of doing this Katia. I love it.
Thank you so much, my friend. I felt bad for using a photo I actually like (doesn’t happen very often) so I went ahead and added a hideous selfie.
I know this was a post about what you are wearing, but I got distracted by the magnets and papers on your fridge. Now THOSE are accessories! I’ve never tried a comb over; with curly hair that would not be successful.
Mine is curly too, but I flat ironed it. Like three months ago… Just kidding it was more recent. Probably two.
You look good even sick! Love it!
Thank you, you are TOO kind, really 🙂 Now come join us, Kate! All women are welcome!
[…] I many stay at home moms are guilty of wearing just about every day. So when my friend Katia, from I am the Milk, mentioned that she and some of my other favorite bloggers were going to do a spoof linkup […]
I love that your fridge looks like mine – covered in STUFF. 🙂
My slippers look just like yours except they’re white and WhereTF is my bling? I missed the bling boat! eeeeep!
I’m sporting a red nose right now, too. Dang colds.
Loved your whole post, Katia! You ROCKED this link up, it’s SO cool to be REAL.
Yoga pants are the new black! Oh, they are black. Well, you know what I mean….
Toldya I was classy. 😛
I’m so glad you came, saw and posted. I LOVED your red carpet look and know that your comment on the previous post inspired this. xo
Haha make up really?? I’m constantly rocking a bun and pjs with druel stains lol
Well, there you go. Now I want to see a pic. 😉
Oh god trust me no u don’t! I only let my husband and kids see me like this lol
HAHA, ok you’re off the hook, although, don’t think I’m proud of any of the looks I’m sporting here… 😛
Lol you’re just braver than I am!
Hair is like a private part- ha! That is comic perfection, right there. Katia, this was the best idea ever! I fear I didn’t do it justice- thank you so much for coming up with such a brilliant concept and letting us all come along for the ride! xoxo
I love you and you totally did it justice. You had me cracking up last night. I’m so glad we’re doing this. This is so much fun!!!
Lol funny post Katia – When my son was younger I definitely stopped wearing any nice clothes and wore basics that I didn’t mind getting dirty since it was inevitable. Now I can and do dress presentably for work. 🙂 If the boyfriend and I go out to dinner I’ll bust out cocktail-worthy cuteness 🙂 Sweats and all you still look cute so work it! Happy Hump Day Katia! -Iva
Aw, thank you, my friend! I’ve seen your blog, I know you’re a tasteful lady, I appreciate your comment. And of course, feel totally free to linkup and share your cuteness with us! I’m sure the boyfriend wouldn’t mind! 🙂
There is nothing classier than a used diaper in a grocery bag because you (of course) forgot the wet bag at home.
Classy is my middle name.
Been there, done that.
LMAO Slipper-bling and snot-laden glam-shots. What more could ya want in a fashion post? 😀
Snot and poop in a bag. 😛
You can’t even make yourself ugly in these photos, your beautifulness shines through. And for those of you who speak English, beautifulness = beauty. Thanks for this amazing idea, Katia; I’m so glad I got it together in time to do it with you all.
Not true, but thank you. I’m so glad you’re in this one. Loveyouloveyouloveyou.
The hair! Oh, the hair! I am a single mother and went on a first date with a man on Saturday with hair that had not been washed for 3 days. A date! But I’m a mom. That’s the way it is. And yes, My accessories are the same except no more diapers. Loved this.
Love you for going on that date with your au naturel hair. Go you!!! And thank you. Come link up with us!
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LOVE this! Just got back from a week long conference. Are we still doing this?
Absolutely! It’s on til Sunday night!
Love the slipper bling and the vision board. But honestly if this is you at your worst, you are doing great!!
It’s funny, reading posts in the hop – I remember those days when there truly wasn’t time to wash hair, and kids lunches ended up all over my clothes! I used to shower with the bathroom door open because the baby was dangling from in it a baby bouncer (only way to do it.)
But it does stop, and I’m not sure when. I get dressed in normal clothes these days, and don’t have sick or slop all down my front!
Thank you so much, my friend. This is encouraging. Some days it feels like this is my new reality. The part I’m especially worried about is do I ever get to sleep again. Some say I will.
I love your blog Katia! So well-written and very creative. I need to take cues as a new blogger! This post was especially awesome as I stood starting at my reflection in the mirror the day after the Awards. How can we compare ourselves to women with nutritionists, personal trainers and makeup artists tucked and pinned into extravagant gowns? We are now trying for baby #2 – and if it happens, I’ll be right back in the trenches of fuzzy slippers, milk gurk and greasy ponytails. But thanks for making mamahood more glam, and all your funny anecdotes. You rock!
I read this in the morning (on yet another “no daycare” day, hence the delayed response) and it made my day, literally. Thank you so much for such kind and uplifting words. It’s an interesting experience looking in the mirror, for sure. I get pulled in so many opposite directions that that on its own would merit a post, but it probably wouldn’t be a funny one. Glad to hear from a new blogger and look forward to checking out your blog, once I get back on regular schedule.
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